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Chris -- 2018-04-11
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A “back-handed compliment†(BHC) seems to insult its recipient rather than compliment them. But just what “back-handed†means is a bit unclear – this post took me a heckuva long time to write up because it was only through struggling with earlier versions that I realized I wasn’t sure of the meaning of “back-handed.†Surprisingly, the OED doesn’t have an entry for “back-handed compliment,†but provides three definitions for “back-handedâ€:
1. With the back of the hand.
2. Directed backwards, or with the hand or arm crossing the body (i.e. for a right-handed man from left to right), as a sword-cut; sloping backwards, as handwriting.
3. fig. a. Keeping back one’s hand, backward, remiss; b. Indirect, like a back-handed sword-cut.
Definition 3 seems the most relevant here, but neither 3a nor 3b seems like a perfect fit. A back-handed compliment certainly holds something back – as definition 3a suggests – but I’d never encountered that meaning for “back-handed†before I went looking for the origins of the phrase. And I also have a bit of trouble with 3b – how does a “back-handed†stroke with either a sword or a tennis racquet lead to the idea of a “back-handed compliment� Personally, I don’t associate “indirectness†with a backhanded tennis stroke. And if “indirection†is the main focus of the adjective, shouldn’t we say “a back-handed insult� After all, the thing you’re drawing attention away from is the implicit nastiness of your comment.
But other possible senses of “back-handed†may also be at work, with more than one contributing to the ultimate effect of the word. We can’t rule out rule out the possibility that definition 1 might seem relevant to some people: a back-handed compliment can feel like a slap in the face, and a back-handed slap will usually muster more force than an open-palm blow. Also, we talk of “giving†and “receiving†compliments, and giving someone something with the back of the hand would definitely be weird and awkward.
In any case, “back-handed†is definitely opaque enough for reshaping. Of the three reanalyses I found, “bad-handed†seems the most eggcornish. As compliments go, “back-handed†ones are pretty clearly bad, and I think there may also be a suggestion of “bad faith.†In addition, “left-handed compliment†is a synonym for “BHC,†and there might similarly be a suggestion here that a BHC is one given with the “wrong†or “bad†hand. (And I don’t intend an insult to any lefties out there…) Examples:
Isn’t it a bit of a badhanded compliment to say I really liked your story but you should find an editor?
http://www.mcforum.net/yabbse/index.php … =showPosts
It must be odd for you guys to finally be the favorites in something. And I don’t mean that in a bad-handed compliment sort of way. It just seems like the national media finally realized what you guys were doing wasn’t some sort of mirage.
http://www.forums.mlb.com/n/pfx/forum.a … &tid=25967
I love this. There’s no better homage to L.A. and it’s peeps than a bad handed compliment. Bukowski would be proud.
http://laist.com/2007/09/26/its_not_you_la.php
does she think that when she says things like “gee, you are SO patient” when my kids are whining down the house, that i believe she is paying me a compliment. nothing like a badhanded compliment to piss me off. patient equals completely ineffective. i get it.
http://onebadmum.blogspot.com/2007/01/m … hbour.html
Most of the independent producers making IMAX films are making better films than the company itself, and that really is a bad-handed compliment. The
lack of a cohesive theatre network (all those independently owned and operated theatres are difficult to organize) and a solid,
carefully thought out product slate is a big obstacle for IMAX, one which must be overcome for it to go to the next level.
http://messages.finance.yahoo.com/Stocks_(A_to_Z)/Stocks_I/threadview?m=tm&bn=23566&tid=57&mid=69&tof=29&so=LR&rt=2&frt=2&off=1
[I’m not sure this would qualify as a “back-handed compliment.â€]
There are a few instances of “bag-handed compliment†out there, but in the two cases below I’m not quite sure what meaning the users intended. How to explain the “bag� Could it be that you’re “concealing your hand� Examples:
And I said this yesterday, when people are upset that you leave—and I’ve gone through this myself and of course he went through it at a very high level—it’s a bag-handed compliment because they didn’t want you to.
http://northcarolina.scout.com/2/742247.html
[This appears to be from a transcription of a q-and-a-type news conference, so “bag†may have been introduced by a transcriber.]
When i get wound up & accuse hibs of being underachievers it is a bag handed compliment. hibs team of the 70’s & their team of 3 years ago should have achieved so much more.
http://sport.scotsman.com/heartofmidlot … 4292265.jp
Most of the examples of “black-handed compliment†appear to be puns – only the first instance here looks pretty obviously sincere to me. The following three examples (two of which are both by the same guy) are referring to the incident in which Joe Biden referred to his future boss as a mainstream African American who is “articulate and bright and clean.†The exact logic of “black-handed†in these instances is a little unclear to me. Blackness here would seem to imply “dark†motives, I guess, but the color symbolism is made more complex by the racial nature of the context:
# But, if it ever comes to the case where i’m single, i hope that i’m lucky enough to find you single and also for you to say yes [but that doesn’t make it any better. we still aren’t dating- and never will. If nothing else, it’s just a blackhanded compliment]
http://alla1.tumblr.com/post/33151883/h … ppen-to-me
[For some reason, I had to alter the punctuation slightly to get the blockquote function to work with this one.]
Joe Biden hit the ground fumbling with his use of the dreaded black-handed compliment (You?re so clean and well spoken! Not like those other . . . uh-oh).
http://www.dissidentvoice.org/Mar07/Adams26.htm
HA! The dreaded black-handed compliment(he speaks so well…)
http://musingsnmn.blogspot.com/2007/02/ … clean.html
Ahhh, the dreaded black-handed compliment of the “You are so well spoken!” variety. Unfortunately, this does not bode well for Biden’s political aspirations. Surely his opponents will never let this one slide, and Biden already fumbled the handling of this non issue.
http://thefirstchurchofmutterhals.blogs … ition.html
[Makes you wish for a time machine, right? What would this guy have said if you could have gone back and told him, “Well, actually, Obama is going to win the nomination and pick Biden as his VP, and they’re going to win the election!�]
I’m not sure how “cack-handed compliment” (16 ughits) would fit into all this.
[Later edit: Oops—I had one example in the wrong category; moved it and fixed resulting incoherence….]
Last edited by patschwieterman (2009-03-07 15:34:48)
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It’s pleasure to read your expositions, Pat. Good clear expression of good clear thought. (I mean that to be a front-handed —or is it a fore-handed?— compliment.)
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Is a back-handed compliment something that appears to be a compliment but is really an insult? Or is it something appears to be an insult but actually is a compliment? I think for me it is more often the latter.
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In many cases it is something the back-handed complimenter intends to be a negative comment but which, when you think it through rightly, brings out a positive quality of the intended target. In other cases the complimenter intends to say something positive, but chooses to disguise it in words that can also be taken negatively.
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So for me, even though they are common, the usages in which the comment seems positive at first but later works out to be an insult would, as you suggest, better be called back-handed insults rather than back-handed compliments.
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Might a bag-handed compliment be a clumsy one?
Last edited by DavidTuggy (2009-03-07 11:06:53)
*If the human mind were simple enough for us to understand,
we would be too simple-minded to understand it* .
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Here’s another variant that closer to the sense of the “back-handed insult” in the form of a “back-ended compliment”
And I love the back-ended compliment you guys gave him, (http://atashmayasd.tribe.net/thread/3d7 … 324bdeec52)
then one person who, after feeling a tad guilty for talking badly, decides to throw out a half-assed, back ended compliment to the person. (http://iamdavidberry.com/archives/90)
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I guess here you’re rear-ending the person (as opposed to blind-siding him.) Probably some blending influence from open-ended, too.
*If the human mind were simple enough for us to understand,
we would be too simple-minded to understand it* .
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Also:
I think Simon just gave Clay a back handled compliment. Just to acknowledge he is a good singer was probably the best we can hope for from Simon.
There’s a black-handled compliment if ever I saw one.
and of course there are variants with the spelling “complement†such as:
Yeah, I am not convinced either, quite safe on this as we are either wrong or paying him a back handled complement !
Unfortunately I did not find any bag-handled, or black-ended compliments. A “Bag-Ended compliment†(which also didn’t show up) would presumably be something like Bilbo’s classic: I don’t know half of you half so well as I should like; and I like less than half of you half as well as you deserve .
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What else is “backhanded†in the required sense? “Backhanded praise†is close, though it seems often to be more like faint praise than damning praise.
Last edited by DavidTuggy (2009-03-07 11:04:49)
*If the human mind were simple enough for us to understand,
we would be too simple-minded to understand it* .
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I’m reminded—admittedly tangentially—of the term “banjo-footed”, used to denote clumsiness. I read it years ago, and can’t recall for sure whether the context was “banjo-footed compliment” or “banjo-footed attempt” or whatever, but I always thought it was a clever phrase based on a strong image which really put across a clear message of clumsiness. Of course, it’s not an eggcorn; it’s not even accidental. Interestingly, “banjo-footed” only yielded 16 g-hits, and not a single one of them was relevant to this usage; they all referred to a particular kind of ashtray design.
Dixon
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